I tend to be a planner. As in I check the menu for a restaurant weeks in advance if I know where we are going so I can start thinking about what I want to order. Holiday plans? Those are usually forming around the start of the school year. It's only natural to assume I'd want to plan my own Mother's Day as well!
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Before we start, I just want to say that I totally trust Micah to plan a day I'd enjoy. It's not about that at all. He's always done a great job of surprising me with thoughtful gifts but I also know that he wants me to have a day I love. Getting to plan my own day is almost part of the fun! Some people would rather be surprised, and that's totally cool! Just make sure by surrendering control that you don't get hurt when the surprises and plans don't meet up with the pictures in your head.
Keys to having a Mother's Day you love:
1. Get your expectations and feelings in check
If you are going in to Mother's Day expecting it to be perfect you will be let down - no matter what. Examine your heart and remember that these people, both the big and the little, are not responsible for your happiness. If your perfect day depends on the children's behavior or the gifts you receive you will be disappointed. If it is hinging on how much attention you get from other's then you will not love the day. Be realistic and honest with yourself.
2. Communicate clearly
All the planning in the world means NOTHING if you don't communicate those plans. If you want to sleep in and have breakfast brought to you in bed - say that! Men are not mind readers. Even if you did it last year you should still tell him. Just like you can't read his mind when he wants something he can't read yours. Tell him if you want out of dirty diapers or dishes (and be willing to reciprocate come Father's Day if he asks) instead of sulking when you are doing them because you didn't say anything.
Let your kids in on the plan, too. Explain that this is a special extra day to celebrate Mommy so you get to make the choices. If your house is like mine a good portion of regular day choices are made by them (games to play, shows to watch, etc.,) so it doesn't hurt to have a day when you get to call the fun shots.
Communicate about gifts as well! Micah and I have always said that gifts are not necessary or needed for holidays like Mother's/Father's Day, Valentine's Day, and our anniversary. But we also both like giving each other gifts so we usually do something. Last year he got me a cast iron combo that I'd had my eye on. The year before was a certificate for a massage because I was constantly stuck on the couch nursing the twins.! If you are hoping for something then send him links to gifts you'd like or make a small list. Don't make him decipher hints and hidden messages - use plain language and communicate your wishes.
3. Remember your budget
If you have a separate budget for gifts and special days then you can use this if it's what you decide. If you can only spare $25 for food and other items for the day then follow that. Get creative with what you have on hand for meals. Look for coupons or free events around your town that you can enjoy as a family. This day should be more about being with the people that make you a mom than lavish gifts or fancy meals.
4. Embrace what happens
Quickest way to stop enjoying the day? Letting your emotions take charge when things get off track. This goes right back to the first step but it needs to be said again. All the planning in the world will not matter when it comes to real life. Kids have meltdowns, food burns, weather changes, diapers explode. Mother's day is no exception to real life. Don't let these put a damper on your day. This day should be about celebrating your role as mom, however that looks to you and your family.
So when your kids bring you breakfast in bed and spill some orange juice on the pillow, take it in stride. When they leave construction paper and markers all over the kitchen table after making you cards, gently remind them to clean up. I'm totally guilty of first reacting and then apologizing for my reaction. Just because the calendar says "Mother's Day" doesn't mean I'm automatically a different mom, even if I might want to be.
Ready to plan a Mother's Day you love? Here are some great ideas:
1. Make a wish list NOW.
If you are hoping for a gift, and have money in the budget for a gift, make a wish list now and give it to your husband. This will give him a chance to shop and for any needed shipping time. Amazon is an easy place to make a wishlist and share it with people you choose. Plus if you have a Prime membership there is two day shipping to make sure any gifts arrive in time for Mother's Day. DaySpring and Cents of Style also have great options for gifts.
2. Choose a breakfast you can prep the night before or that takes very little morning prep.
I am the main food prepper in our house. I stay at home and Micah works super long days. He still works along side me on the weekends but he's also out of his element when he's on his own. Add five kids into the mix and trying to get a breakfast to me in bed could result in disaster. I often choose dishes that can be made ahead and stored in the fridge until morning. In years before I've chosen stuffed French toast bake, coffee cake, muffins, and egg bakes. Take a gander at my Drool Worthy Breakfast Pinterest board to get some ideas for your own breakfast!
3. Orgainze Craft supplies
My kids love getting crafty but aren't always sure what they are allowed to get into for special occasions. They have a special spot for their own coloring items but for certain times I let them dive into my stash. I'll make sure there are stickers, paper, and anything else they might want for making cards and pictures while Micah is making breakfast. I also like to print off or have several options of those fantastic "All About My Mom" printables pulled up on the computer so Micah can pick one for the kids to each fill out. I love looking back over those each year!
4. Make reservations ahead of time
If you want to go out to eat, especially somewhere that tends to attract a Mother's Day crowd, get your reservations made ASAP. You don't want to be stuck waiting for hours with kids in tow. Or end up somewhere you'd rather not be because the wait was atrocious. To be perfectly honest, we don't bother with restaurants on these types of holidays anymore because getting space for seven of us is simply too difficult.
5. Put in orders early
Is a cookie cake from the mall part of your Mother's Day plans? What about a sushi platter (this is totally in mine!)? Get those orders in early so staff has time to get it all done in time for you to pick up.
6. Plan any events or activities
Want to hit up the theater for a movie with your gang? Get your tickets bought. Check out the Facebook pages for your local parks and attractions. Many will offer free admission on Mother's Day to moms and sometimes to whole families. Keep an eye on the weather forecast if you plan on being outside! Maybe plan a picnic lunch or roast s'mores over a bonfire.
7. Soak up the family time
Who says you need a full docket of plans? Some of my favorite Mother's Day memories are hanging around the house with this gaggle of kids I call mine. We color, we wrestle, we read books. It's not a whole lot different from other days and that's okay! Loving this ordinary, everyday, chaotic life is what we need to do. If we can't love the ordinary moments then how can we love the extraordinary days?
What are your plans for Mother's Day? Do you plan it all yourself or would you rather be surprised? What's your best Mother's Day memory?